there’s sometimes a gap, ya know, between what we read and claim to believe and what we actually practice. We believe that the spirit guides and directs, that Jesus calls us to follow in obedience even when we can’t see through the other side. It isn’t logical nor does it make any kind of sense for a man to step out into a roaring sea… except when it’s his friend and savior that’s beckoning. I don’t know what the rest of the guys in the boat were thinking when Peter stepped out into the water to walk towards Jesus but I’m betting they were thinking what we would think: BRO, it’s water. You like for sure can’t WALK on it. But Peter? Eyes on Jesus. It legit didn’t matter what they were saying, he knew where Jesus was and he was going. Or what about Abraham who was asked to sacrifice the very son for whom he had waited and believed God was going to fulfill His promise through? Obedience. Not contemplating, making a pros and cons list, logically thinking through or trying to make sense of. Obedience.
We felt the call to a specific city almost 4 years ago now after The Lord lead us to a certain place 5 years ago. I can’t go into details just yet but 4 years of believing we’d be there eventually but never knowing how or when. We didn’t know if it would be years or decades. And honestly I don’t know that we were completely confident that it was a desire from The Lord or just a fleshly desire.
Ryan came to me in October 2020, after officially being out of the army since June 2020, to say that he felt The Lord telling him he wasn’t done with the army. *cue all the emotions from me.* I was like wwaaaayyyy not on board. We spent the next four months praying, talking to mentors, literally met with a counselor more than once, talked with friends, did an marriage study. We spent hours upon hours upon hours walking through this decision. And maybe another time I’ll share more details but it came down to this: The Lord made it very, very clear through a series of events that the army was what was next for our family. And I was still like “uhhh, can we not?” But we were clinging to this phrase: “blessing always comes on the other side of obedience.” And knowing this is what he wanted, to do anything else would be direct disobedience which really would just be us (read: me) believing I know better than The Lord what’s best for our life, that surely signing up for military life can’t be best. But I was faced with the reality of this: if I believe He is good, He is sovereign, He really works all things for our good and His glory then what He’s asking of us is best. Maybe it brings deployments, maybe it’s living a contenannt away from family, maybe our kids grow up losing and making new friends every few years. From my view it made actually no sense. And yet… I knew it’s what He was asking us to do.
Peter did walk on the water. The Lord did provide a sacrifice for Abraham and The Lord did fulfill his promise to Abraham through Issac.
So, here we are. 57 days down of training. And we’ve got projected orders for his first duty station. And would you believe me if I told you that out of the 17+ duty stations he could’ve gotten, this one being one of the least likely for a whole slew of reasons, The Lord in his grace is sending us to the very place we’ve felt pulled for the last FOUR YEARS. We can’t say anything quite yet but we’ve talked to a dozen people who have confirmed that The Lord had to be at work in this because there is no other way we would end up here.
The Lord is faithful. He is kind. He is gracious and merciful. My doubt and unbelief does not deserve this goodness!
This is not a testament of how The Lord gives us what we want, because I believe that’s mostly not true. That he grants the desires of our heart when HE is the center of our heart. When we are so IN Him that His will IS the desire of our heart.
Blessing comes on the other side of obedience. Maybe weeks, months or years later. But The Lord is faithful to do a good work, to work all things. And friend, as a speak this over myself I speak it over you: stay rooted in His word, in the spirit that you may recognize His voice when he beckons, that like a sheep knows his shepherds voice, we may hear the quiet voice of the Father when He speaks.
Stay rooted, friend, in the only thing that lasts.